We’ve all been there. We’re sitting down watching a movie when a random make out scene happens and you kind of sit there like, “What the hell is this?”

I’ve felt that a lot recently. I’ve decided to take on the gargantuan task of watching every Marvel movie in order and I’ve come to a realization. I feel Captain America, Iron Man, Thor, Hulk and so many more fall in love and have that be one of the main propellants behind their heroism. 

And I am tired of it. 

It is absolutely exhausting watching these characters who are renowned for their selfless acts of heroism be tarnished by the fact that a lot of their main motivation in these movies isn’t the safety of everyone, but the safety of whatever other character they were written to fall in love with.

I think the most egregious version of this happens in the 2008 movie, “The Incredible Hulk.”

From this point on. Every movie I mention will have heavy spoilers for the story of the movie. If you want to watch these yourself, click away now. You have been warned.

The entire movie from start to finish, we are constantly reminded that Bruce Banner still loves his ex-girlfriend, Betty Ross. While that’s okay, when the two are finally reunited about halfway through the two-hour long film, we are “treated” to a scene where Bruce and Betty attempt to share a physically intimate moment with each other.

This completely detracts from the rest of the movie as a whole. Yes, it does serve as a constant reminder that Banner cannot live a normal life and cannot have moments like this anymore, it’s just a spit in the face of the audience.

Not to mention, after Bruce’s disappearance from Betty’s life, she entered into another relationship. At the time of Bruce and Betty’s little moment, she was still in a committed relationship with another man! She cheated on her boyfriend just to be with Bruce and that’s so saddening to me.

Then finally, at the end of the movie during the final battle between the Abomination and the Hulk, the only reason the Hulk wins is because he realizes Betty is in danger and gets an insane power up that’s just barely enough to overcome the Abomination. Just five minutes before he was getting tossed around by the Abomination, and now he suddenly has the strength to beat him all because his “girlfriend” is in danger?

Not only does it not make sense, but the overall impact of that scene is also significantly lessened because of this single piece.

And it’s not like this is an isolated incident. In “Captain America: The First Avenger,” we’re introduced to the one and only Steve Rogers. A skinny boy from Brooklyn with dreams to join the Army with his best friend Bucky Barnes and fight Nazis in Europe. When Steve finally joins the Army after being scouted for the super soldier program by a scientist, he meets Peggy Carter during his military training. From the moment the two meet eyes, it’s clear the connection between them.

Thankfully, for most of the movie, the two of them share only that, a connection. However, there is one particular point in the movie where a lady very clearly tries to seduce Captain America (Steve Rogers) and Peggy walks in on the two kissing. Never mind the fact that Cap only has his sights set on Peggy and would never do something like this.

Peggy, rightfully so, gets incredibly angry at Steve. So much so that in the next scene when he finally gets his vibranium shield, and he asks her how she thinks it’ll work, she picks up a pistol and shoots at Cap four times then rather unbothered remarks that, “Yes I think it works.”

It’s clear that this scene is solely there to give the perfect relationship between the two characters some incredibly unnecessary drama and shock the viewer because immediately following this scene, the two are back to work and move past this moment exceedingly quickly. 

Then, in one of the final scenes of the movie as Captain America is bringing down a Hydra bomber over the arctic, he’s on the radio with Peggy until the moment he hits the water. Despite how I feel about the romance between the two, it’s truly a touching moment. 

In this one moment, Captain America sacrifices himself to save hundreds of thousands of people all the while giving up his life and his chance to be with Peggy to be the hero. Overall, this movie played on the romance between Peggy and Cap much more than the romance between Bruce and Betty. A more subdued and sidelined plotline fits the overall theme of the movie much more.

Then finally, “Ant-Man”. 

Going into this movie off the back of “Avengers: Age of Ultron,” and yet a second stupid romance side plot involving the Hulk and Black Widow that takes too much screen time, There’s an entire scene where Black Widow tries to convince Banner to run away with her so they can live out their lives together. I was hopeful that this would be the movie that would finally break the trend. 

Throughout the whole movie, the protagonist, Scott Lang, makes his motivation very clear. He wants to improve himself and gain visitation rights for his daughter, Cassie.

Scott, an ex-con who did time in San Quentin for “stealing” money from his former employers, becomes wrapped up in a plot to steal a shrinking suit from Pym technologies that Darren Cross spearheaded the research for.

Two other characters that play pivotal roles in the planning of this heist are Hank Pym, the former Ant-Man, and his daughter Hope. 

At first, we’re introduced to Hope as this calm and collected character who is working as a double agent for her father trying to find weaknesses in the defenses of the building. There’s a point in the movie during Scott’s training arc to become Ant-Man where Hope confesses that she went from despising Scott to almost liking him. 

From that moment, I was so much more hopeful that there would not be a romantic plot and as the runtime shrunk, there was no indication that there would be any kind of romance in this movie.

Then as the three are settling down after the previous night’s events, Scott decides that it’s his time to head out and Hope offers to walk him out. After a moment where Hank reflects on some discoveries made during the movie, he stands to open the door into the hallway where he and we, the viewers, are surprised to find Scott and Hope kissing just behind the door.

I hated the fact this happened. It feels like some writer finally realized at the end that they didn’t include their coveted romance side plot and just blindsided everyone by including this one moment. It was just thrown in there for zero reason and gave me insane whiplash.

Time and time again, I’m endlessly disappointed as I chain myself to my desk and sit through these two-hour long works of art only to see them include more of the same.  Every. Single. Time.

I hope as I continue to see these movies, the writers can give their characters more depth not through romance but instead through the character’s own self-reflection and effort to be the hero. Unfortunately, as it stands, that won’t be the case.